I walked past groups of rough boys at 2am the night after the Malaysian Independence Day. Some of them said hello or wanted to talk to me, but I only said hello and waved and kept walking. They were illegal Philippinos and Indonesians, mainly, and they had an agressive appearance with many of them dressed in quasi-military clothes.
One of them was making a scene by yelling and then sitting down on the road, blocking traffic. He had a shouting match with some women who stood by the road. I didn’t stop to watch the proceedings but some of the locals did. The last thing I saw was that a police car arrived, lights flashing.
One Philippino guy I saw earlier, and got a good look at because he insisted he was the love of my life, wore camouflage clothes and military boots. He had a black t-shirt with letters in red which said “WAR”. He had a goatee and long hair with a ponytail, not in gay style but in gang style.
This “WAR” guy could not accept that he wasn’t my type. He had chatted me up on the street by talking about girls and when I said I was into the other gender he had offered himself. He got angry when I said sorry, I wasn’t interested. He demanded to know why.
What was I supposed to say? Point out his faults in detail, beginning with the fact that he was straight, ugly and dangerous? That would only make him angrier. So I didn’t reply, and he kept saying “why not”?
I was alarmed to see how quickly his temper flared. Don’t they have anger management classes in this country? Another guy, a friend of the “WAR” guy, intervened to calm him.
Today I read in the newspaper that a security guard had been killed at 4am in the same spot I had seen the crowd with all the bad boys. The guard had tried to break up a street fight and someone had stabbed him.
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There is a man with silver hair in this Internet cafe. I have seen him before. He doesn’t use the computers, but he likes to talk to the boys. Suspicious. I bet he is coming here just to chat up boys half his age and invite them to readings of Shakespeare. Tsk tsk. I am glad I never sank to that level. I go to Internet cafes strictly for the Internet.
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I was walking in a market when a young man who was selling food smiled at me. I gave him the thumbs up.
- You like him? asked another guy at the same food stall.
- Yes, I like him, I said.
- I give him to you for the night!
I was not sure how this other guy could “give” the handsome young vendor to anyone. Was he his owner? The boy who was supposed to be given to me said nothing. He just smiled with his perfect grin.
And what did they mean by “give”? I had a feeling it was not free, but involved a fee.
Why this blatant offer? This was close to where my friend the fish monger worked. I guess word got around about me.
They put me on the spot by shouting like this. A dozen people heard it. Don’t they realise it is embarrassing? I thought the best answer was no answer. And the boy, gorgeous as he might be, was not qualified. My gaydar gave a zero reading.
Tags: Kota Kinabalu, Malaysia, Sandakan
September 2nd, 2007 at 11:13 am
Those are tough “street-level” negotiations, SF. Glad you got out of there safely.
September 2nd, 2007 at 12:03 pm
It was no place to hang around. These people were stereotype gang members. Where do they learn to dress and behave like this? By watching MTV?
September 2nd, 2007 at 2:16 pm
Korea doesn’t qualify as Christian?
September 2nd, 2007 at 5:09 pm
Why do you care so much if people are gay or straight? These are western inventions, I myself feel lucky to go places that gay/straight has not yet conquered. Also Philippinos are starved for Gay White Males, much easier to find gays that are handsome and eager and not-for-pay in Manila than in Bangkok. I don’t think that has much to do with being christian, just that GWMs are a rarity. I am always eager to please.
September 2nd, 2007 at 9:10 pm
It’s Filipinos, not Philippinos.
September 2nd, 2007 at 10:46 pm
Happi: straight boys just don’t enjoy the fun and games like gay boys do.
Bupa: I get it. Filippinos are from the Filippines.
September 2nd, 2007 at 10:54 pm
I hear the Philippines is a dangerous place for Gay men. I had thought of Living there but have settled on Thailand.
September 2nd, 2007 at 11:43 pm
Ken, the Philippines are a dangerous place for any farang to live…because people think you have money. It isn’t a gay thing. Actually, Filipinos are some of the nicest and most gorgeous people on earth. It is just that their society sucks.
September 3rd, 2007 at 2:19 am
The Philippines might be mainly catholic but the south (Mindanao) is mainly Muslim and very dangerous, especially for whites. Similar to Thailand as it happens.
September 4th, 2007 at 3:16 am
KJ,
I traveled extensively through the Philippines in the mid 80’s and actually came to the States to pursue a Masters in Poltical Science that I wrote on the Philippines and the fall of Marcos.
I remember once while traveling on business that I was warned not to travel to Manila because someone had put a contract out on me and of course I was warned of this persons connections. He was quite MACHO and I could see where he would have a certain desire to be seen as part of some sort of mafia. So, I went to his home brought his wife a gift…spent all day there drinking and eating with his family and a few of his associates. He had the most beautiful son….who was in drag the whole day!
There is a lot of gangsterism and machoness in the Philippines. I believe most of it is caused by the break down of the concept of patron clientism…in other words the old rules no longer apply and you have a society that is starting to crumble.
We have to understand Ntang Na Loob…or basically you scratch my back and I will scratch yours….which applies to Thailand also.
When the military pulled out of the Philippines alot of things changed for that country…the globalization of the world for one. It is funny, no one speaks as good English as a Filippino yet all the call centers for US companies are located in Inida….hmm…
Bet the crime rate would drop dramatcially in the Phillipines if we started putting Call Centers in the country….
I doubt if Thailand will go the same way as the Philippines did….if you believe that Thailand will one day be destabilized then you might want to study Cambodia as a model for what might happen….
April 3rd, 2008 at 11:30 am
i want the pictures of the gay mens.because i also a gay men.