Gay Boy Thailand

My grandmother-in-law has stayed with Chalerm and I for a week now. Granny is a widow and 72 years old. She has ran out of grandchildren to baby-sit in the village and now she is on holiday in Bangkok.

Granny doesn’t do much when she stays with us. Actually she doesn’t do anything. My idea of nothing doing anything, lazy as it is, at least includes reading a book, surfing the Internet or daydreaming while watching the sky. When granny does nothing she really does nothing. She doesn’t watch television, she doesn’t listen to the radio, and she doesn’t even look out the window. I am impressed.

Thais like to come to visit suddenly, without telling you before they arrive. I am lucky if I am told when she leaves the village by bus.

Chalerm went up to Anybury to get her so this time I got an early warning. Chalerm no longer spends much time in Anyburi. He was homesick at first when he moved to Bangkok. But now he isn’t in school in Anyburi anymore. Many of his friends have moved away. Those who remain are married, or they have 12-hour-a-day jobs and Chalerm doesn’t see them. There is little for Chalerm to do in the village. He can organise fun and games for the children, which he does sometimes, but that quickly gets boring. Now Chalerm goes back to the village and returns to Bangkok in one day.

I am not supposed to ask how long granny will stay here. Thais don’t like to plan ahead. If I ask Chalerm will ask me why I need to know. This is true. I don’t need to know. It is simply my farang habit of asking, wanting to know what the plan is. But this being Thailand there is no plan. Maybe she will stay another day, or another week, or another year. I will not know until she suddenly has packed her bag and is leaving.

I am not sure if granny considers me a human life form or not. I am a farang and she sees me as I would see a little green man from Mars – a complete alien. Granny doesn’t speak to me. This is not out of hostility but because I am an alien. Would you speak to an alien?

Granny has diabetes and makes her own special food in the kitchen. Chalerm has his own taste and makes his food too, or eats out in the soi. Granny never leaves the apartment. Bangkok is a big place and she is afraid of getting lost. I think she is wise. I don’t want any granny search and rescue operation. I have yet another taste in food (no rotten fish with stinky sauce please) so I also eat out. I am afraid we have no cosy family meals in this house.

Granny doesn’t like air condition. Instead she opens the window and turns on the fan. She forgets to close the door to her room and then her scheme ruins my air condition.

Granny has staked her territory in our apartment. She has the guest bedroom, the kitchen and the 3rd bathroom, which I had forgotten we had. The 3rd bathroom is tiny. Inside are a squat toilet and a cold-water shower. I have never used this bathroom but granny much prefers it to our incomprehensible Western-style bathrooms.

My grandmother-in-law doesn’t make much fuss. She never sits in the living room. She seems surprised if she runs into me. The look on her face says “Do you live here too?”