Gay Boy Thailand

Anonymous wrote…
First it was Thai Boy Entitlement Syndrome, now it’s Cranky Old Thai Hag Entitlement Syndrome. I don’t know how you put up with it.

Chalerm may not be in a position to explain to her what is acceptable behaviour, but some one should - she needs to ask if she can come to visit, say how long she’s staying, make sure it’s not too long, don’t insult the farang, and make her own entertainment. And make it VERY clear that she appreciates her pension.

You’re not in the merit making business.

Silom Farang wrote:
According to Wester culture I agree with you. According to Thai culture… well… That Granny should ask before she comes to visit us? Oh no can do. She is The Elder. She is really entitled. It is her right to visit any of her family when she feels like it, and to stay as long as she wants. It is the duty of the family (Chalerm and me included) to take care of her.

To ask her how long she intends to stay would be an insult. She doesn’t know that anyway, she will arrive without any plan or time limit and she will make up her mind to leave one day.

The only reason I get to hear about her arrival before she walks in the door is that she calls ahead to get Chalerm to pick her up at the bus station.

She has never thanked me for her pension, or mentioned the pension at all. If anything we, the younger ones, should thank her. It is the duty of her (grand)children to provide for her in old age. As she sees it, Chalerm is only doing what he should do when he gives her money every month. Never mind that it is actually my money.

Since she is The Elder it doesn’t matter that it is my apartment. She must be number one in the house. She can criticise the younger ones but they can’t criticise her. She must be respected.

That’s Thai culture. It would be unwise of me to challenge granny directly, for example by telling her that her time is up and that she can go back to Anyburi now. Thais would see that as barbaric behaviour. If I have anything unresolved with her I must use indirect means, Thai style, and avoid confrontation. I could, for instance, tell Chalerm that since granny is here now I might as well keep the pension money safely in the bank untill she needs it…