Mr. Anonymous wrote
The “intensity of being together” - yes, that sums up life with a Thai bf pretty well ! I’ve been with him for long enough periods to know what that is like.
Re-reading what I wrote, I should point out that he has no doubt made me a better person too !
I wonder about the connection between moodiness and boredom … or perhaps “Thai ennui”. As good as Thais can be at finding fun in next to nothing, they do seem rather ill-equipped to deal with boredom, which they are often quick to identify. They don’t generally read, they don’t have hobbies, they don’t exercise for exercise’s sake … they just don’t have “interests”. One could perhaps argue that these are middle-class ‘luxuries’ that the people of Isaan have no time or need for. But if we farang supposedly think too much, they often think too little. A recent Sawatdee post related the story of a group of Thai adults contending they had no need for “opinions”.
Given your experiences and those of your friends, I’d be interested to hear your thoughts on where the seemingly stereotypical behaviour patterns of many Thai gay boys might come from.
H.
Since you are a late arrival at the party you missed the glory days of this blog, about six months ago, when I wrote hundreds of pages trying to explain Thai boys. This was when I had my daily soap opera going, short stories and two half-finished novels.
The short answer is that Thai society keeps them childish. This is an authoritarian culture. They are not encouraged to think for themselves or to be independent. They remain immature. BUT this is also why they are so charming, lovable and passionate.
This reminds me I should dust off my manuscripts again and see what I can make out of them.
November 23rd, 2005 at 6:17 pm
I have actually been here from the beginning, and enjoyed all the elements from your stories that resonated with my experiences.
Re the nature of Thai gay boys, you seem to be arguing that these dysfunctional behaviours are a “Thai” thing, whereas I’m leaning towards interpreting them as a “gay/feminine Thai” thing. Unfortunately I don’t know any straight Thai guys in the way I know gay Thai boys. These behaviours do seem to be common amongst the latter, but I have no idea if they are common amongst the former too.
If they are more of a gay thing, I think that raises different questions about their origins.
Perhaps some of your readers who have more experience of straight Thai boys (eg University lecturers or high school teachers) could advise re their maturity / childishness ?
H.